The pattern of unnecessarily creating crises in your life is actually an avoidance technique. It distracts you from actually having to be vulnerable or held accountable for whatever it is you’re afraid of. You’re never upset for the reason you think you are: At the core of your desire to create a problem is simply the fear of being who you are and living the life you want.

A belief is what you know to be true because experience has made it evident to you. If you want to change your life, change your beliefs. If you want to change your beliefs, go out and have experiences that make them real to you. Not the opposite way around.

You think your past defines you, and worse, you think that it is an unchangeable reality, when really, your perception of it changes as you do.

Your mood is a filter through which you experience your life.

A lack of routine is just a breeding ground for perpetual procrastination. It gives us gaps and spaces in which our subconscious minds can say: “well, you can take a break now,” when in fact, you have a deadline.

Intelligent people say, “I don’t personally understand this idea or agree with it.” To speak definitively about any one person or idea is to be blind to the multitude of perspectives that exist on it. It is the definition of closed-minded and short-sightedness.

Feeling lost is actually a sign you’re becoming more present in your life—you’re living less within the narratives and ideas that you premeditated and more in the moment at hand.

If what you’re experiencing is insecurity or uncertainty, it’s usually going to lead to something better.

Becoming angry with how much you’ve let yourself be walked on or how much you’ve let other people’s voices get into your head is a sign that you’re finally ready to stop listening and love yourself by respecting yourself first.

You question yourself. You doubt your life. You feel miserable some days. This means you’re still open to growth. This means you can be objective and self-aware. The best people go home at the end of the day and think: “or…maybe there’s another way.”

People think happiness is an emotional response facilitated by a set of circumstances, as opposed to a choice and shift of perception/awareness.

The way you will quantify this year. How many books you want to say you’ve read, how many projects you’ve completed, how many connections with friends and family you fostered or rekindled, how you spent your days.

How you will remember this time in your life 20 years from now. What you will wish you had done or stopped doing, what you overlooked, what little things you didn’t realize you should have appreciated.

The idea that perhaps the current problem in your life is not the problem, but that your perception is skewed, or you aren’t thinking of solutions as much as you are focusing on your discomfort.

The fact that you do not think the exact way other people think, and that perhaps the issues you have with them are not issues, but lapses in your understanding of them (and theirs of you).

What your future self would think and say about whatever situation you’re in right now.

The best nights of your life. Not only what you were doing and who you were with, but what you were thinking and what you were focusing on.

What “enough” means to you. What’s enough money, enough love, enough productivity. Fulfillment is a product of knowing what “enough” is—otherwise you will be constantly seeking more.

The fact that the way to change your life is to change the way you think, and the way to change the way you think is to change what you read.

(If you think love is something that exists anywhere but within your own mind and heart, you will never have it.)

If you’re wondering “what you should do with your life,” it’s likely that you’re in the limbo between realizing you don’t want what you once did, and giving yourself permission to want what you want now.

We assume that people think the way we do—because our internal narrative and process of the world is all we know.

(in fearing that happiness won’t last forever, we lose it—in fearing that grief will last forever, we create it).

The emotion most associated with fear is interest, believe it or not. It’s even been said that fear has two invisible faces: one that wants to flee and the other that wants to investigate.

Start a “journal of days” where you write down a sentence or two to sum up each day of your year. The reason keeping up with a journal is only sustainable for a week or so is that nobody has the time (or energy) to thoughtfully or extensively detail their everyday lives. Yet we miss out on the incredible opportunity to see how far we’ve come and what our lives are ultimately comprised of when we fail to—so make it easy for yourself. Just write down one sentence that sums up the day before bed. In a year, you’ll be grateful you did.

Aspire to be someone who gives things meaning, not who seeks things to give them meaning. Rather than chasing “success,” chase kindness. Rather than believe wealth is the mark of a life well lived, believe that intelligence is, or kindness is, or open-mindedness is.

Remedy your tunnel vision by writing your narrative on a piece of paper. Start with: “My name is…” and then go on to list where you live, what work you do, what you’ve accomplished, who you spend time with, what you’re working on, what you’re proud of.

Do more. If you have time to be regularly consumed by irrational, spiraling thoughts, you need more to focus on, more to work toward, more to suffer for. Make sure you’re living more than you’re thinking about living.

When you ask other people for advice on whatever you’re worrying about, first ask yourself what you hope they’ll say. That’s what you want to tell yourself.

Validate yourself. Choose to believe that the life you have is more than enough.

You think that “happiness” is a sustained state of feeling “good,” when it is really a higher “baseline” for perception. You are better able to process every emotion, and because you do so healthfully, you return to your general state of contentment quickly.

Potential unrealized becomes pain.

Your brain can’t differentiate “good” from “bad”; it only knows “comfortable” and “uncomfortable.” This is a pretty raw example, but it’s the reason why criminals never think their actions are “wrong,” they think they’re justifiable. It’s why we do things we objectively know are bad for us and confuse them for “feeling good.”

“Familiar discomfort” feels the same as “comfort.” Which is why so many people are stuck in “ruts” or absolutely do not want to change even though they know it’s what would be best for them.

The only way you grow is by stepping into the unknown. It’s why so many people have “breakdown before breakthrough” moments. Often, their lives are leading them to better possibilities than they thought possible; they just didn’t know it was “good” at the time.

Trying to make sense of your life is trying to see if the old story checks out, if the person you once were would be happy with the life they lead today. You’re looking for answers in people that don’t exist. Clarity comes from doing, not thinking about doing. A good life comes from choosing to work with what you have, accepting that you don’t always choose what you work with, but knowing you’re always given what you need to use, especially when you don’t realize you need to use it.